My Sphere of Madness

I haven’t been a very good blogger lately,
and for this I apologize.
But I have to say, it’s not alway that easy.
When I started blogging on “My Sphere…”,
I made a choice never to bee too personal.
I have another blog for that.
What happens in everyday life wasn’t important.
Creativity and opinions more so..

But as Majann pointed out to me today -
I can’t just separate myself from myself..
Every word I write is obviously ME.
But I’ve still tried to keep some sort of distance.

I failed, and horribly so.
I do acknowledge this fact.
Like my last entry.
Not distanced at all!
Actually, it was quite personal.
Honest and straightforward.
And it taught me this:
One is not supposed to blog at 3.55 in the morning!
Ones judgement is strangely clouded in the middle of the night.

Anyway, I have also made it a rule that I never delete posts.
So,  “When life hands you lemons..” stays.
But I will try not to do it again.
Some thing are not meant for everyone to read.
Sorrow and frustration should not provoke this.

As I might have mentioned,
writing is my way of processing reality.
I often find myself exposed within my words.
And at some points in life, that just doesn’t feel right.
I’m going through a phase like that..

The result: It’s been quiet.
And I can not promise a sudden change in that fact.
I need to process, but I can’t do it here.
Maybe I’ll find it appropriate to publish some old stuff,
or maybe I’ll find a sudden inspiration to write something brand new.
Only time will show.

There is a difference between “me” an the real ME.
“I” write this blog. Dark an despaired as it is.
I  am someone else, and yet the same..
I wrote the last post. Personal an vulnerable.
“I” stray away from reality, and find comfort somewhere far away.

I have created this Sphere for “myself”,
and within it is my sanctuary.

MY SPHERE OF MADNESS IS MADE BY WORDS.
THEY’LL TRICK YOU INTO MY WORLD.
MY WORDS WILL CHARM YOU, SEDUCE YOU, AND HARM YOU.

MY SPHERE’S AS SHARP AS BLADES.

MY SPHERE OF WORDS IS HIDDEN WITHIN DARKNESS,
ONE STEP WRONG AND YOU ARE DOOMED.
FOREVER MY CAPTIVE – AND ONCE IMPRISONED,
YOU’LL NEVER BE RELEASED…