It’s strange how people can get upset over a choice you make when it hurts nobody. That is, except their feelings. “Do this for us,” “do it for them,” or “do it for me.” Why do anything at all if you really don’t want to? All you end up with is feeling pissed off for having to do something against your will, you’ll end up acting petty against the people you’re supposed to be pleasing and you’ll all have a crappy ol’ time.
It amazes me how people expect you to act all jolly and fine with being forced. That’s not how it work, is it? What makes us happy is doing things for others because we want to. That’s what makes people happy in general. You feel good about it, they feel good about it, and we all get that sickening good feeling in the pit of our stomachs.
Yes, I probably should’ve done this to make you happy, but I didn’t. I would’ve done this to make you happy, if it pleased me, but it doesn’t. Yes, I could’ve done this to make you happy, but I won’t.
Freedom of choice is the key here. We all have it. I have the freedom to say no and you all have the freedom to get pissed about it. I have the freedom to say I can’t be bothered and you all have the freedom to try to make me feel guilty about it.
The bottom line is this: It’s a choice to be made and there will be consequences to deal with. Still, it’s the freedom you have to choose that makes it all worthwhile – consequences be damned.
So this is my choice: I choose to do what I want, when I want to, and however the hell that pleases me. There’s no need to get pissed about it. I won’t if you won’t.
I updated one of my pages! *does little victory dance* So, now you can all click the button above that says ‘Do the ballerina pose’ and watch the ballerinas in action! Not bad, huh? Oh, and there’s more pictures to come, I just need to look them up in my insanely huge picture library. These were the ones I had lying around on my computer, so I’m gonna start looking through my external hard drives to find the rest and trust me *sighs*, that’s a HUGE job! But I will – I have decided! 
And for the ‘stuff’ part of my post: I want to take this opportunity to remind you all there are more pages on this blog *gasps* I know! I’ve done my part (for now at least – if you have additional questions, feel free to ask) telling you all a bit about myself on the ‘Me’ page, so now it’s your turn! Leave a little message on the ‘You’ page and let me know who you are, that you popped by and all that jazz.. And if you don’t feel like introducing yourself but would like to say hi nonetheless, the ‘Everybody else’ page is for your pleasure. I don’t like the word guestbook, but I guess you could say that’s what it is.
As for the ‘Randomness’ page – I have no idea what to do with it! But I’ll think of something. You can trust me on this! But for now…I’ll have to get back to you that..
So, that was my little introduction to my pages. Call it advertising. The point is to make this blog at least a little bit more interactive. I love getting feedback, so go ahead – let me know what you think! If it’s about the posts, the pages, the pictures or the weather, it doesn’t matter. I’m here for your entertainment!
I spend most of my days in my own company. I’m not complaining, I’m just stating a fact.
Being alone is usually considered a bad thing. They say people aren’t supposed to be alone, it’s not how we’re created. We flock together and being alone doesn’t seem natural to us.
We often confuse being alone with feeling alone, feeling lonely. For some reason you’re not supposed to be alone, you’re supposed to feel lonely when you’re not together with other people.
At least that’s what they say.
I don’t get it. Most of my childhood and even more as I grow older, I find myself enjoying my own company. Sure, there might be a slight chance that I’m becoming a little bit odd, spending all on my time alone with no one to talk to than my plants, but I’m okay with that.
Spending time alone is a strange sort of therapy for me. If there’s been a period of time where I’ve spent too much time with other people, I tend to get stressed. I need my alone time, to calm down and relax, to be at ease with being myself.
In company with other people there are so many rules to follow. Remember what to say, or what you’re not supposed to say, be polite, be sociable, be this and be that. Do this, do that, remember what not to do.
I’ve heard people say that you learn most about yourself in the company of other people and in a way I think that’s true. On the other hand I believe you learn just as much about yourself, if not more, being by yourself for a longer period of time. I figure that if you can’t stand being around yourself, with no one else to distract you, how could anyone else?
At least that’s what I think.
Still, I think the most interesting aspect of being alone is the difference between just that, being alone and feeling alone, feeling lonely. I’ve always believed solitude to be a physical state and loneliness to be a state of mind.
With all the time I spend in my own company, one would probably think I spent more time that I do feeling lonely. I often wonder why it’s not like that. I’ve never had a problem being alone, I’ve never had that need to constantly be around others. I enjoy spending time in solitude, to be able to reflect and ponder, to undisturbed do my own things, simply being able to be me, without anyone else interrupting, without feeling the need to be anything else that just that, alone.
I’m not saying I never feel lonely, or that I don’t enjoy being around other people. I’m not saying I don’t need anyone else or that I never wish I had someone to share things with. I’m not saying I’m happiest on my own, I’m just saying I’m comfortable in my own company, that I don’t mind spending time on my own.
The question it then: Why do I have the need to say this? I’m not sure.
Someone asked me a while back how I spend my days. I told him that I spend my days working, then I spend my evenings alone in my apartment. He was puzzled. His follow up question was: You don’t do anything, you don’t go out with your friends, have a hobby or at least something to keep you busy? My answer was no. I guess it’s a half-lie, as I do all of those things. But normally, I don’t. I spend my days by myself, I do this and that, keeping myself entertained in one way or another, but the thing people tend to get stuck on is the fact that I do it alone.
I honestly don’t get it. Why is being alone such a bad thing? Why are we supposed to feel bad every time we’re left to our own demise? Who decided that’s the way it’s supposed to be? Why is being able to enjoy solitude a bad thing, while feeling lonely is the norm? Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
It’s just a thought…
